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You'll need plenty of patience and laser eye surgery to get the most out of any 3DTV. (The best TVs all tend to have 3D these days, whether you like it or not). It's bad enough having to wear (or share) those goofy glasses, and if already wear a pair of real glasses...forget it.
There are a few attractive pairs of 3D specs, but a huge majority of them just can't be worn in mixed company. The TelevisionInfo.com crew has willingly adorned the five gaudiest pairs of 3D glasses we could find—all for your entertainment.
The Worst of Way-Back: Samsung SSG-3300CR
Most flashy white shades look right at home in a Kanye West music video, but the distinct old-lady shape makes the Samsung SSG-3300CR glasses look like a prop from Are You Being Served? Then there are the large clumps tucked behind each ear: one contains the battery, while the other hangs onto your head for dear life.
Thanks to its hideous design, these glasses have been blasted off the market, but we guess you could hunt them down somewhere. At least our model could tuck a pair of regular glasses behind them.
Cyclops' Other Pair: Vizio VGS1 Active 3D Glasses
Designed by Professor X himself, Vizio's VGS1 glasses couldn't get any more super. They're alright for watching TV, but their handiness shines while fulfilling your duties as a late-night vigilante. We don't think tear gas could even penetrate these goggles. The $80 MSRP is hefty, but Vizio smartened up and cut the price in half. The only thing left to do is cut crime in half.
Embarrassment Included: Samsung SSG-3050GB
There's no escaping the SSG-3050GB: they're included with Samsung's 3D TVs. The ultra-thin, ultra-flimsy temples make these shades look like they'll jump off your face at any minute. They're $30 on Samsung's website, if you really want to drag one of your friends down with you into uncool-oblivion.
Not Quite Virtual Reality: Sony TDG-BR250
Come on, Sony. We can see right through your thinly veiled homage to VR Troopers. Reminiscent of the days when the World Wide Web was all the rage, the TDG-BR250 has so much bulk that you'll need a permit to wear them. They do a great job of keeping out light and scaring off potential dates!
They're currently unavailable from Sony's website, but we found them on Amazon for under $50. If you're really that set on embarrassing yourself, we've instead found a pair of Hammer pants for about half the cost.
Not Quite Aviators: Xpand X103 Universal 3D Glasses
The picture says enough about Xpand's X103. Biplanes are back, baby. Rumor is, these glasses work best when watching Dogfights on the History Channel. Although we're sure that these shades are tough enough to face the Red Baron, we can't wait for them to disappear.
Bonus Round: Coraline in Button-Popping 3D!
These 3D glasses included with the "*Coraline*":http://www.amazon.com/Coraline-Two-Disc-Blu-ray-Combo-Anaglyph/dp/B00288KNJU DVD/Blu-ray were just too purple to pass up on. Our models had headaches in seconds, seeing purple and green hours later. They'll hurt your eyes just as much as your swagger, ladies and gentlemen.